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Monday, December 2nd, 1996 AP Pollsters Try to Kiss and Make Up Inconsistency - or stupidity, take your pick - is one of the true hallmarks of insanity. Of all the things that happened in this past weekend, which was a wild, wonderful affair that saw the Hokies secure a second straight Alliance Bowl bid, this takes the cake. Tech moved up in the AP poll from #17 to #11. Hmmm, wait a minute. Only two teams in front of Tech lost (#16 Syracuse and #10 Notre Dame), and yet, the AP pollsters ... vaulted Tech over Washington, North Carolina, Kansas State, and Alabama??? You know, I had more respect for them back when they were consistently giving us the shaft week after week. Heck, I was even learning to enjoy it. I sifted through at least 3 emails a day complaining about the AP poll. It was starting to be our badge of honor, this year's sign of disrespect that was leading us to newer and greater heights ... and now this. What this indicates to me is that the sports writers weren't disrespecting us - they weren't even paying attention. I can picture it now: all of those Twinkie-eating fools were sitting around the house this weekend, doing nothing, and they finally got an eyeful of the Hokies, who were busy pasting their third ranked team in a row. Then on Saturday, Miami beat Syracuse, and the unthinkable happened. A 10-1 Tech team that was ranked only #17 was going to the Alliance. Again. No, sir, the greasy-fingered, potato-chip-eating fools thought. That won't work. Gotta fix that. We look like idiots. Lemme see, where's this week's ballot? Ah, there it is. Let's see now, move 'em up over Alabama, K. State, UNC, Washington, and -- whoops! There's good old Northwestern! Can't put the Hokies above them! There now, Virginia Tech is ranked 11. Much better! Well, I'm not buying it. You're too late to earn my gratitude, sportswriters. Because what you do doesn't matter. With Miami's average ranking being 19-1/2, and Tech being ranked #9 in the coaches poll, you could put us at #29 and we'd still be going to the Alliance! So there! Have another Ho-ho, take a nap, and dream about the Notre Dame fighting Irish all you want. Tech's going to the big dance! Unless they make up some rule in the next week that'll get Miami in ahead of us.... (Don't email me. I'm just kidding.)
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