Classic Rock Football Jeopardy
by Jim Alderson, 8/10/01

You know it is past time for the season to start when all activities, even listening to the radio or watching television, get one to thinking about football season. Feel free to add your own.

1.) Thick as A Brick
What should replace ĎRocky Topí since it is more applicable to the Tennessee football program?

2.) We Gotta Get Out of This Place
What is the normal Syracuse reaction to Lane Stadium?

3.) Truckiní
What will Bobby Wallace be doing in January?

4.) I Shall (Not) Be Released
What did Walt Harris tell Ohio State?

5.) Closer to Dome
What does Paul Pasqualoni hear when he listens to Grand Funk Railroad?

6.) Sounds of Silence
What will reverberate around Veterans Stadium from those twenty thousand non-existent ticket holders?

7.) Against the Wind
Where will Frank Beamer and Bud Foster want Miamiís Ken Dorsey attempting most of his passes?

8.) City of New Orleans
Where is an 11-0 likely to land Tech?

9.) Tiny Dantzler
What does Rod wish he had at WVU?

10.) I Still Havenít Found What Iím Looking For
What did Ricky Bustle say about Techís quarterback situation?

11.) Tuesdayís Gone
What will CUSA fans say after the season ends?

12.) Long Long Time
When did Roy Kramer say a team from a non-BCS conference could be expected to receive a bid?

13.) Noel, Noel
What will Tech fans be chanting after Grant hits Andre for eighty yards?

14.) Wild Horses
What will it take to get Hoo fans back into Scott Stadium for the Second Half?

15.) Are You Experienced?
What question did the brass at Miami, Rutgers, West Virginia and Hooville not ask during the interview process?

16.) Snow Blind
What does Frank Beamer want the Canes when they enter Lane Stadium December 1st?

17.) Lawyers, Guns and Money
What will it take to keep Temple in the Big East?

18.) Tequila Sunrise
What do Tech tailgaters see the morning of noon games?

19.) Long May You Run
What will Frank tell Lee Suggs during pre-game?

20.) Two Out of Three Ainít Bad
What did Terry Holland exclaim after asking algroh, "Are you available immediately, will you work cheap, and are you a good coach?"

21.) Bat Out of Hell
What does a Scott Stadium halftime resemble?

22.) Hotel California
Where do Tech fans want to spend New Yearís?

23.) Kiss It Away
What will fans of Rutgers be saying, again, about their season by the end of September?

24.) Wish You Were Here
What will George be telling algroh as he sails the Chesapeake this season?

25.) Sky Pilot
What did Larry Coker call for after seeing his OOC?

26.) In The Year 2525
When can algroh be expected to deliver the MNC?

27.) Comfortably Numb
In what condition is Rutgers football best observed?

28.) Message In A Bottle
What was Terry Hollandís second choice for getting the word to George?

29.) Why Canít We Be Friends?
What does Howard Gittis sing in the shower?

30.) Tangled Up in Blue
How does Larry Coker not want Ken Dorsey beginning the season?

31.) Mean Mr. Mustard
Upon what will Pitt fans blame the first home loss of the season?

32.) Minstrel In The Gallery
What would George have rather had in Scott Stadium than the Hoo band?

33.) Should I Stay or Should I Go
What was Frank Beamer humming late last November?

34.) Patience
What will fans at WVU need?

35.) Thunderstruck
How will UConn leave Lane Stadium?

36.) Spill the Wine
What is grounds for ejection at Scott Stadium?

37.) Thatíll Be The Day
What is the reaction of the Rutgers 1000 to Greg Schianoís talk of winning the BE?

38.) November Rain
What was everybody really tired of by the time last yearís Tech-Hoo game kicked off?

39.) Wonít Get Fooled Again
What will be the response by BE presidents to Templeís claims they will do better?

40.) Summertime Blues
What are football fans experiencing at the moment?

41.) On the Turning Away
What is going to happen at Tech when many football fans try to get into the lots where they have parked for years?

42.) Time of the Season
What seems like it will never get here?

Jim Alderson, who first made his mark with his biting political commentary on the A-Line email newsletter, also brings a unique, sarcastic, and well-informed perspective on college sports, particularly (1) Virginia Tech sports and (2) ACC sports.  While Hokie fans currently have very little use for subject number 2, Alderson is an entertaining and informative columnist on subject number 1.  For even more fun, visit Jim's A-Line home page.


          

TSL Columnists Archives

TSL Home